Tuesday, April 12, 2016

14 Weeks Already?! And Adoption

I don't even know where the last week went. Seriously I jumped from 12-13-14 without really noticing it! Training plan is at a standstill for weights basically. I'm at where I'll be for a little bit.

Quick update, everything's great :). Right paraspinals are still getting occasionally sore and some mild right sacroilliac irritation but that's much better after seeing my Sports Chiropractor Guy the past two Mondays. Not much change from week 13 so lets get to the rest of my life!

Missed the gym a couple times in the past week, family time comes first. I had my biological daughter this weekend. I am a biological mother in an open adoption. In Wisconsin open adoptions are not legally binding. When I birthed my daughter and placed her into the arms of another mother I had to hope that they would keep up with what they agreed to. And they have gone above and beyond that.

For the past couple years twice a year I've had my biological daughter in my home overnight WITHOUT her parents! Yes, you read that right. I can truthfully say I've never heard of this situation with minor adoptees happening with any of the other biological or adoptive parents that I associate with. Having all my kids under one roof is emotionally overwhelming. It's truly amazing and surreal and at the same time very sad. I know the next day she goes home, to her parents. Her real parents, the one's that raised her and taught her all she knows and took care of her when she got hurt and sick. I've missed those things and seeing her in my home reminds me of the things I never got to do with her. That pain of that reminder is no where near the joy of seeing her laugh and smile and drive her big sister crazy and chase her little brother around the house. I am very grateful that I get to have these moments with her. She got to chill with  her cousins too and hang with the grandparents. She met her paternal grandfather for the first time.

It usually takes me a couple days to emotionally recover from seeing her, even when we didn't keep her overnight. Not just because I'm sad, but because I'm happy too. I know that she is who she is because of the decision all her parents made nearly 12 years ago. Us and them. They chose this path as did we and we share an amazing little girl because of it.

No More Pictures Mom!!

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