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Friday, May 13, 2016

Life Plans? Haha

Is there ever really a plan? I'm not so sure.

I have plans. I have plans to get in super awesome shape. I took a little over a week off with the vacation and a really excessive amount of yard work. Plan was back to it today but we had a parents group event that could NOT be missed! It was the Big Rig Gig in a city really close to us. Lil man got to "drive" semi's, a fire truck, dump truck, garbage truck, and even a police car! He had a great time climbing in and out of all the cool trucks. We missed going in the Humvee but he was way more interested in the semi's.

So tomorrow right? Back to the gym? But nope, I'm doing something way more important. Bringing my son to see his brother. I can't wait for them to have some time together! With their dad being basically absent they really don't see each other ever. It's good that my son's brother's mother wants to hang out with us too! 

Saturday night maybe. After little guy goes to bed, it's pole time for me. Put on the music and just dance. Especially now that my skin is feeling much better from last weekend! A bit burned on the belly, thighs, and chest. No peeling yet so I think I'm in the safe zone :). 

And I have plans to be financially ok. Which is sort of the case. I owe a private loan of a lot of money and a slight amount on my medical that would have been paid off first I didn't have my car break down twice in the last couple months and secondly I could have not gone on my very much needed vacation. 

And I have relationship goals. Well I've had relationship goals since I was 5. And that's probably the most significantly stressful part of life. There is one person in charge of my workout routine generally other than the small ways of activities getting in the way. There is really only one person in charge of my finances other than the unpredictable breakdowns on the car or random home repairs. But there is one thing you will never ever fully know, the mind and heart of another person. I want safety and security in a relationship. And hopefully that is how things will play out but really even after ten years with one person I thought would always be there, he left without warning. Everything can seem doable to you when the other person just wants to walk away because that's what's easier to them. I want what most people want. To wake up next to someone who loves you as much as you love them every single day. Someone who drives you nuts in all the right ways and puts up with your pet peeves and knows the little things that make you smile. Someday maybe. Until then, dating will suck and I'll keep planning my life around me.


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